So driving to work this morning, I have off tomorrow and Monday, I am listening to the Grateful Dead channel on Sirius/XM. Love it. They were playing a concert from San Francisco, 12/30/83. When I turned it on, Bobby was rocking “the Women are Smarter” and man that is a great song if you are a woman. It’s righteous and raw, and I dig it. They segued ( an unusual segue for the Dead) into Terrapin. Jerry, so soulful, and he knew the words! That’s big for an 80s Jerry song. I just love how that song morphs from one soft ballad to a true musical treat. The song is a journey and just forces reflection. Today is a day of reflection. A friend of mine who was ill her whole life died on Tuesday and will be buried today. Her favorite Dead song was Scarlet Begonias. Listening to Terrapin and hearing “The story-teller makes no choice. Soon you will not hear his voice. His job is to shed light, and not to master.” So powerful and makes you feel like some stuff you are told, the rest you have to figure it out.
Last night our former sitter, Mara, came over and we had Hanukkah with her. The boys were so excited to see her and she generously brought them gifts she knew they would love, and they did. She is just a love! We had such a nice talk and although I didn’t want to sound preachy or old, I just wanted to emphasize to her that when you are young you need to really enjoy yourself. Go out, have fun, date, party, etc. We never know where life will bring us and although you can plan for the future, you need to live in the moment. Although I had a lot of fun as young person, I was always distracted by my future, would I find someone I love who will love me back, will I have a family. I was not good at watching things unfold. Ahh if I only listened to Terrapin more often.
So recently Earl and I went on an evening cruise on one of my company’s unbelievably over the top yachts. There is a new attorney in our office who just moved here from the NE. He was planning to go but his wife had to work so we invited him to drive down to the harbor with us. Well he got way more than he bargained for! He is young and they are only married a few years with no kids. Since I am the poster child for autism awareness at work, he asked about Bryan and could we give him an example of some of the behaviors he has that can be difficult or illustrative of his disability. Well I can assure after he got out of our car he will not be trying to have a kid any time soon. I joked that he was going to buy condoms on his way home. In reality it must be strange to hear what we talk about, like speaking Swedish or something. Autism is mysterious and scary and we really put it out there. One of the best things about writing this blog for me has been people telling me that I am giving them a glimpse of what it is like to have a child with autism and what Earl and I go through. Sometimes things that seem very mixed up can make you see what isn’t.