Survivor-Autism Edition

I totally dig Jeff Probst. He’s so cute and sassy. I can’t wait to watch tonight, I’ve never missed a season of Survivor. So in thinking about this, I wondered, could a random person survive 39 days in my house? Outwit, outplay, outlast? Come on I dare you. If the sleep deprivation doesn’t get you (most days Bryan wakes up by 5-it’s cute he comes in and says “Mommy I give you a kiss” and then kisses me), then the screaming or perseverative speech will definitely do the trick. For those of you not up on the “Spectrum lingo” perseverative speech means repetitive speech.  It is not uncommon for Bryan to repeat something every 30-45 seconds all day. For ex. on the weekends, he says “i can eat dinner at 6 o’clock” in a half question/ half statement starting at just after breakfast. Also he does some random screaming which is so loud, as I’ve said before, it’s truly a wonder that our neighbors don’t call the police. The contestants could try some of the strategies we employ, anti anxiety meds, zombie like existence, sleeping anywhere you land in the house, or emotional eating. The outwitting part may seem easy, but let me tell you, these kids are smart as can be. Bryan knows everything that is going on, and he will get you to the breaking point easily. When he is aggressive (nice mixture of autism and puberty induced testosterone level) he will pinch, bite or kick. He will do this then run away. Then, when you get upset, cry, yell or try to calm him down, he starts with the maniacal laugh. That’s a really good one for the novices. Let me see anyone try and outwit that one. I triple dare you there. So what is the key??? Outlast!!! That is the only real strategy. Oh, and you will need alliances. You can’t do this alone.  You need family, friends, therapists, doctors, etc. Choose wisely, some are just there to mess with you. As I’m writing I am thinking I wonder if I like Survivor so much because I live it?

But unlike the show which will make you rich in money(if $1million can even be called rich these days) I am rich in something so much greater. I have the love and trust of the sweetest, most delicious boy on the planet. So while I am half heartedly complaining about things, definitely venting, I am also appreciative of the perspective my crazy life has given me on the kind of Mom I want to be and the kind of love I want to give to this boy.

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